I am the queen of perfectionism.
Everything HAS to be perfect or I don’t put it out there!
I’ve learnt, if you aim for everything to be perfect, nothing is ever good enough and no one gets to see anything!
And like a lot of things, it all comes back to not being good enough.
I love what Brene’ Brown says about children in her TED talk about shame. When they come into this world, we try to make them into these perfect human beings and yet, we should be allowing them to stuff up every step of the way and come into this world knowing that they are perfect just the way they are.
And recently I listened to Mary-Lou Stephens in her Tedx Talk at Noosa 2014. What she says about toddlers is also true. Whenever they come up against something, and learn something new, they take a pause and stay in that moment of wonder. It is only when parents or caregivers come along and make a fuss about whether they might fall over or damage something that they learn about drama and start screaming too.
So what is my point?
For many of us, this sounds familiar. Somewhere along the way, the joy of stuffing up and making mistakes was no longer an option so we continued to try to make things perfect, and now that we’re adults, nothing is ever good enough. Is this ringing true for you?
Let go of the perfectionism and allow yourself to stumble and fall and get up and fall and get up again. Allow yourself this rhythm to find yourself into your own truth and authenticity.
Because it is in this stumbling that we find our way and the courage to express who we are in all our vulnerability and humanity.
This for me is the true expression of art, the art that connects and brings about change in the world.
A TIP from TAP (The Artist’s Playbook):
So how do you kick perfectionism to the curb? Because really, it is a bit of a pain in the butt. Take it from me and those of you who are perfectionists will know what I mean. It is a nuisance.
I remember when I was doing my 365 rock a day project in 2011, it took me FIVE times to push that button before I allowed my first post on Jan 1st to fly out into cyber-sphere! Five times! I pushed post, then delete, post, delete, post, delete, five times before I let it fly – forever.
And it is still out there, STILL getting attention four years later.
This is why I want you to just do it. Just put your art out there and take the risk of being judged, because you will be judged. Take the risk of not being good enough, because in someone else’s eyes your work will not be good enough – for them. But don’t let it be through your eyes. Take the risk now, for continued long term success later. And even in that moment, when you decide to share, I tell you, that first response to your sharing will be the most awesome-ist feeling! Trust me.
And keep putting your work out there. But don’t wait until it is your absolute best work because people want to see your process too. They want to know how you got to your finished product and the stories that go with that. They want to hear about your triumphs and your failures. They want to know that you are a real person with real stories that reflect who you are as a person and who you are as an artist.
This is what connects with people. This is what will draw people in to your work. And yes, there will be people who won’t like what you do, but that’s ok. Put your work in front of those who LOVE what you do and stay connected to them.
The journey will be challenging but persistence and a deep desire to do what you love will drive you forward to continue to do what you love and to share this with others.
And I’m not saying that your perfectionism will suddenly disappear overnight but the more you put yourself out there, the more confident you will become because those people who love what you do will be encouraging you to continue.
So what can you do right now in this moment?
If you are on social media – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Google Plus – however you connect with people, create one post that shares your work. Whether it is a finished product or a work in progress – share it! Write some words, take an image of your work, then share it! Do it NOW!
Let me know how you get on in the comments below. Would love to hear your feedback and please share a link to what you have been creating!
And keep creating!
Jo 🙂